Just for Yucks!!!

 

After much extensive research, I've been able to gather the best of this years Thanksgiving jokes. These are my favorites. I hope you agree. Enjoy!

Thanksgiving jokes for Grownups:

1) Q: What did the turkey say to the turkey hunter on Thanksgiving Day?
A: Quack, quack!

2) A young man who worked at a grocery store had just finished stocking the turkeys in the freezer when a woman approached and asked, “Excuse me, do these turkeys get any bigger?” “No ma’am,” he replied. “These turkeys are dead.”

3) Q: How do you win an argument with your family at Thanksgiving this year? A: Hit the “End Meeting” button.

4) I shot my first-ever turkey for Thanksgiving this year. Sure scared everyone in the grocery store, though.

5) So this guy checks into rehab the day after Thanksgiving. As it turns out, he just couldn’t quit cold turkey.

6) Q: What’s the difference between Election Day and Thanksgiving Day?
A: On Thanksgiving, you get a turkey for one day. On Election Day, you get a turkey for four years.

7) Q: How many cooks does it take to stuff a turkey?
A: Only one, but you have to really squeeze him in there.

8) Q: If the Pilgrims were still alive today, what would they be most famous for?
A: Their age.

9) Q: What does a disappointed mother turkey tell her kids?
A: “If your father could see you now, he’d be rolling over in his gravy!”

10) Q: Why was the turkey ruined on Thanksgiving?
A: I have no idea, but I suspect fowl play.

11) This morning, my wife said she wanted me to help fix Thanksgiving dinner. I said, “Why? Is it broken?”

12) Q: Why did the cranberries turn red?
A: Because they saw the turkeys dressing.

13) Q: What sound does a turkey with one leg make?
A: Wobble, wobble!

14) I was going to serve sweet potatoes for Thanksgiving, but I accidentally sat on them. Now I’m serving squash.

15) Q: What do you call a turkey on the day after Thanksgiving?
A: Lucky.

16) Q: What can never, ever be eaten for Thanksgiving dinner?
A: Thanksgiving breakfast.

17) Q: What do jazz-lovers put on their potatoes at Thanksgiving?
A: Groovy.

18) Q: What are turkeys thankful for on Thanksgiving?
A: Vegans.

19) Thanksgiving is a time to count your blessings, one by one, as each relative goes home.

20) Q: What’s blue and covered in feathers?
A: A turkey holding its breath.

21) Q: Why didn’t the cook season the turkey?
A: There was no thyme!

22) Q: Why did the turkey bring a microphone to dinner?
A: He was ready for a roast.

23) Q: What smells the best at the Thanksgiving dinner table?
A: Your nose.

 

Photo Courtesy of little_plant