The Slap Heard Round the World: What it says about us

 

The Slap Heard Round the World: What it says about us

 

By now, everyone has heard or knows about Will Smith’s altercation with Chris Rock at the Oscars with the whole world watching. I don’t think I need to elaborate on the details. I guess all that can be said has been said. Today, I’d like to think that Will is remorseful and with or without hair, Jada is an incredibly beautiful woman - stunning. Chris Rock is stoic, funny and handled himself well. In this post, what I’d like to explore is what has brought us to this moment and, more importantly:

What it says about us.

Like many of you, I couldn’t believe, didn’t want to believe, it was real. Automatically, I thought it was fake. Who does that? Walk onto a stage, and b!*tch slap someone on an auspicious night of glamour in front of God and ‘er body, then shout expletive’s from his seat toward the one he just slapped?

Apparently, that would be Will Smith.

Why? I’ve heard a myriad of reasons bandied about. I don’t care so much about those. My concern is what has brought us to a place in our society where something like that can happen? What has brought us to a place where Will felt comfortable doing that and not be arrested, instead supposedly getting away with it? Would he have done it if Dwayne (The Rock) Johnson had made a joke about his wife or Jason Momoa to name a few?

I’m not so sure, but wait … he might.

It seems our social morés have sunk after witnessing the death of George Floyd. Robbers have run amok in Macy’s, and Nordstroms, vicious assaults on innocent people are rising, especially if elderly, Asian, or Jewish; the momentum of defunding the police has caused me great concern. Storming the capital after questionable election results surface, jailing, and then releasing criminals due to equity or political expedience. All of this and more is alarming. Is it any wonder then that an illustrious celebrity, like Will Smith, would be so brazen as to, in Chis Rock’s words, ‘slap the shit outta me’ for telling a mildly funny joke in reference to Jada Pinkett-Smith’s bald head.*

In light of where we’ve sunk, what follows are my opinions only on the matter.

I remember reading a psychology report on children. I can’t recall who wrote it or what magazine or book it came from, but the premise was that babies are born selfish, narcissistic, vulnerable, and helpless. When you think about it, that’s true in the most innocent of terms. Babies have no concept of right and wrong. They only think about their needs, their wants, and ultimately themselves. Some may argue that that is not the case, they are merely altruistic, selfless in other words. I lean toward the latter, myself. But for this post, let’s take a deep dive into the former premise to examine the worst in human behavior.

Shall we?

Children grow out of this selfish, me, me, me phase earlier than we think, primarily because we teach them that the world does not revolve around their needs. Mom and Dad need to sleep sometime, and vegetables are good for you. They are taught the difference between right and wrong, sharing, yes and no, please and thank you. But, without proper parental guidance or a responsible adult presence in their lives, they lean very near to being uncivilized heathens. They’ll do what they want when they want. Say what they want, and behave how they want with little to no consequence until they get out into the real world.

The real world is a great teacher. It can provide the best and worse influences.

In the real world, children learn the boundaries of acceptable behavior. Some push this boundary; others don’t. They learn the consequences of good and bad behavior. The consequences of bad behavior are reinforced in children raised to function well in society. The opposite cannot be said for children raised without these social skills. They lack the coping mechanisms needed when things don’t go their way. Disappointment is a constant companion. Violence, is never the answer and should be avoided at all costs. 

Here the argument turns to nature versus nurture.

Ah yes. Is it a child’s natural inclination to be good or bad? Or is it the condition of the home that determines this outcome? I don’t have a definitive answer, and I suspect science is still trying to determine the correct one. I will say that based on behaviors I’ve seen play out in all aspects of life, political leaders, entertainers, tech oligarchs, grocery store Karens, despotic dictators, elitists, etc., bad behavior is on full display.

Children, like adults, need structure - they crave it without voicing it out loud. They need to be told when to go to bed, when to bathe, how to eat properly, and behave in public. They need to understand the order of things to function well in civilized society. To reap the benefits of behaving well is what we all seek. Without this guidance, children, like adults, feel lost. Without this, chaos and anarchy ensue. As adults, we are nearing the behavior of children who lack guidance and structure, flailing wildly in search of what is appropriate or not giving a damn either way. 

We are behaving in an uncivilized fashion, like that of heathens. In a world where countries are being invaded and World War III threatens … I think we can do better. I think what we witnessed on the Oscar stage was a wake-up call. A call to have us stop and reflect on what we, especially as Americans, are presenting to the world on how to behave and treat each other. It shouldn’t be what we have witnessed in the streets and on the stage that night. It should be that we treat each other with dignity, compassion, respect and love for our fellow man. 

Will Smith spoke this sentiment in his acceptance speech. I only wish he had applied it to Chris Rock.  

 ~DaMarie

Photo Courtesy of Pixabay Images

 

*Disclaimer: Alopecia in all its forms is real. The effect it has on the human self can be devastating, especially for women. This, in no way, is an attempt to make light of the condition. Chivalry and the act of defending a woman’s virtue and honor are applauded but should be done in a dignified manner.